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Lowbrow, relating to, or suitable for a person with little taste or intellectual interest. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lowbrow

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I was 14 and babysitting the neighbor’s kid over at their place.

I’d had a crush on both of the neighbors for some time and always felt a little awkward and shy around them.

I left the kid watching cartoons and went to the bathroom to pee.

I was gone a minute, tops.

When I came back, the kid was playing with a huge green dildo.

It had poop crusted on it.

My crush ended abruptly.

The worst part was that I had no idea where it had come from, and so I just threw it under the couch and hoped that it was the right place.

I never did babysit for them again.