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I went out drinking with two buddies of mine, and after 5 hours of excessive intake we headed home with 3 girls we met at the bar.
They invited us into their old house on the walk back to our apt. and the place was a severe crack shack.
They told us that the house was condemned and then they commenced to peeing in all the closets.
My buddies looked at each other, shrugged, and one began making pee waterfalls down the stairs into the abandoned living room while the other dragon blasted the walls trying to write his name.
Not to be outdone I decided to take a shit in the kitchen.
Too late I realized that the only thing to wipe with was a dried up old sponge and I mistakenly used the rough side which left me feeling oddly violated, yet strangely aroused by my own actions.